something so small

Oh dear...I'm a blubbering mess...

I'm standing here in Layla's closet going through clothes and in true girl form I stop and started looking through all of the items I set aside to keep forever...this one is what started the emotional roller coaster.

This simple doll has so much love, emotion and tears soaked in it.

 

One day after Layla was born her neonatologist came in and said that Layla had meconium ileus because of her CF. Which means her poop was basically tar in her intestines that could not get out on it's own so they were sending her to Cook Children's and the ambulance was on its way?! That is a lot for this mom, who just had a baby, to handle.

When the Cook's team arrived at Baylor the very first thing they did was give me this doll and told me to place the doll in my bra so that it would smell like me and it could be close to Layla when I could not be. So I hugged, squeezed, prayed and loved this doll as much as humanly possible so that when it was next to my girl she would feel all that love and know that her momma was there and would always be there to love and take care of her.

 

 

Thank you Lord for sweet and kind of difficult memories that bring such joy.

Thank you sweet friends for being my prayer warriors and being such amazing friends.

 

xoxo,

jo

All Out Trinity

80 degrees...sunny...80 degrees...sunny...let that sink in...

Today and tomorrow the weather is going to be perfect.  Which means the next question is what am I going to do in DFW to get some serious dosing of vitamin d?  Well, for my fam we are going to head out to the Margaret Hunt Hill Bridge for All Out Trinity tomorrow 3/1.  There is something for everyone and so we are all going, the hubs, both kiddos and myself.  Nathan is psyched for the disc golf, kids are beyond thrilled to walk on the sweet bridge and this mom is thrilled to get my vinyasa on stretching with 300 of my closest friends with Yoga on the Bridge 

After yoga what is better than replenishing with Dallas' best food trucks...yumm!!

Get out, enjoy the sun, find me, say hi, give a stranger a smile...because it's going to be a fab weekend.

xoxo,
jo

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Cystic Fibrosis bites...ya, totally bites the big one and I hate it...I really do.  But the funny thing is that it has also provided for me some of the greatest joys of my life.  Crazy right?!  I prayed so stinkin' hard that Layla would be a perfect little punkin girl when I was carrying her and we then we found out she had CF.  Devastating.  The unkown.  Are we prepared for this?  What will her life be like?  How long will we have her?  What will life be like?  What will her doctors be like?  My mind was a tornado of emotions and questions and ultimately fear of the unknown. 
 
Funny thing about life is that God completely steps in if you ask Him to.  In my fear I fell on my knees and prayed that I be filled with everything I needed to be the perfect mom for Layla and that God protect her and fill her with JOY.  JOY...that word just kept coming up in my thoughts and prayers...JOY...in the midst of uncertain times ahead why on earth would the word joy be at the forefront of my mind?  What I didn't realize was that God had me, he had Layla, he had our family in His arms and he was whispering exactly what I needed to hear and be filled with and that was complete JOY in a trying and difficult season.

God answered and is still answering so many prayers with the word joy.  Every time we come to a season of unknown with Cystic Fibrosis God just whispers "joy" and I know that we are taken care of.  From Pseudomonas, to battling weight (needing to gain some), to the daily struggles in breathing treatments and other treatments we have to work into our crazy schedule.  We have found joy in it all.  Smiling all the way...

  Today I am going to choose Joy.  Today I am going to be thankful that Layla has gained a few pounds :)  Today I am smiling because no matter what is thrown at me and our family we WILL be okay, NO MATTER WHAT and that is good so good.

xoxo,
jo

Well, hey there darlins...

Funny thing about New Year's Goals...sometimes life gets in the way and you can't start on those goals until mid, eh hem, late February.  In my case it was a touch of pneumonia?!  What on earth. 

Better late than never right :)

2014 Goals

• have friends over for a meal around the table every other week
• mail or personally hand someone a hand written note once a week
• don't be a blogging stranger...sorry loves!
• run a 5k every quarter...hello Color Me Rad...I'm coming for you!  ps, old navy has some adorable work out gear on sale right now!
• go to Taos with my hot hubby
• master the balancing act of kids, marriage, work, etc...whew...I think I can I think I can
• SMILE a lot because God is good and regardless of what is thrown at me LIFE is good!

Here we go...2014 is going to be stellar!

xoxo,
jo

Happy First Birthday Layla Jean...a year ago

When did it happen that my sweet Layla turned one...let alone almost two?  In just two short months my baby girl turns two.  It seems like just yesterday that Nathan was rushing...and I mean rushing me to the hospital because I was in labor with Layla and we're about to celebrate her second birthday.  We are completely blessed with our dancing, singing, giggling ball of energy and joy.  

As I am reminiscing about Layla's first two years I thought I'd look back at her first birthday party.  Oh what a party it was...We decided to invite all of Layla's prayer warriors so we could say thank you for getting us through our pregnancy and year of unknowns with Layla having Cystic Fibrosis.  Having most of our family and precious friends in one room was amazing.  We provided a dinner for everyone and we were able to say thank you and we love you to everyone who was there, a true blessing for Nathan and I.

Here are a few of my favorite pics from Layla Jean's first birthday...

a welcome wreath on the front door

Layla's smash cake...strawberry...so good :) she LOVED it!

I made her cake which was strawberry with homemade buttercream icing.

The fam

Layla's cousin and sweet friend Kaylee

some of the best friends we could ever have asked for...each of these people are a blessing 

Nathan rounded out the party by singing "Sleepy Jean" to Layla.  What a sweet moment.  Layla and Rhett danced along.

Completely blessed by these memories and cannot believe I will be posting her second birthday pics soon!

xoxo, 

jo

long lost friend...

new posts coming soon...i promise :)

while you wait here's the fam saying howdy from texas!

xoxo,

jo

toddler...what?!?

when did my baby turn into a toddler?  i have no idea...it must have been when he stopped crying in the morning and started calling "mama maMA MAMA" or was it when he stopped crawling everywhere and decided to put one foot in front of the other and walk all around?  oh dear me...i have a toddler!

my sweet, adorable, giggly, 6 tooth son has turned ONE!  we had to mark the occasion filled with fun and tons of family and friends...one thing i want to instill in my sweet child is that he is surrounded by people who love him and who first and foremost love the Lord and will help guide him in his life and walk with God.

well, for Rhett's birthday we partied...cowboy style!  oh it was the most fun.  honey and pops were gracious and let us crash their homestead for the afternoon.  what fun...it was an afternoon filled with oh so yummy vittles, sweets galore, mustaches (that's right - "a cowboy's not a cowboy without a great 'stache) and of course cake and homemade ice cream.  for Rhett's birthday i wanted to make his cake just like my mom did for me and nathan's mom did for him so i made Rhett a cowboy boot cake and a small bandana smash cake...which he SMASHED!

the times had were amazing and the memories are unforgettable and just priceless.  that is only because of all of the wonderful people who were there to help celebrate our sweet little cowboy's day.

now, while words are good snapshots are always more fun so here's the day in pictures.

  the sweet spread including the boot cake :) yummm

 the birthday boy with mama and daddy

cowboy Rhett just loved his cake

 and finally the mustaches :) gotta love them and gotta love the fam!!  just wish i could've gotten everyone in a mustache pic

oh the memories...time has flown and i know that this time next year when we have a two year old and a 7 month old i am going to be saying the same thing.

we are truly blessed...thank you LORD!!

xoxo,

jo